Da Cugini godda prawblim witch youse!

[randgrithr]

Yestidday I went diggin wit Noo Yawk digga etta undisclowzed locashun neah him en amung udda dings we found dis interestin decades old crime seen. So dat youse awl can appreshiate it awl da maw I am quite happeeta narrate in da appropriyit dialec witch iz Brooklynese, en witch I speak floointlee havin been bawn in Bay Ridge an awl. [] So awn tooda show.

Dis iz wut happinz to wiseguyz who seriuslee irritate da Cugini. Dis heah automobile haz been introduced to da woild sevril decadez ago az youse kin see by lookin' ettda botanical life fawms around it. Itz driver az youse will awlso presently loin metta simila fate. To take da pictchur we wuz standin onna train tracks weah diz car wuz apparently left to ingratiate itself violently widda choo choo.

 

[randgrithr]

Behold da awsum destruktiv fury uv some nameless gangstaz upon an unfawchunite vehicle. Da wackiest part iz dat for awl diz car haz been tru, two udda freakin tires aw still fully inflatid. I want deze tires faw my car. Dey don't make em like dey usedta.

 

[randgrithr]

Ez youse will see inna next photo, diz wuz not a place ennywun wantid to be, and indeed da last awccupint uv diz vehicle prawbibly left quickly an poimanently. But dat wuz awbviuzly befaw da car wuz left onna tracks to destroy da evvidince.

 

[randgrithr]

Diz iznawt wut I wud cawl nawmul weah an teah onna driva side door. Youse must admit dat iz a good pattern, sumbuddy knew dere bizniz widda heata. Itza gud ding diz happind at least sevvinty yeahs ago becuz it is scary. I am so scared by dese guyz so Ize glad dat da gingerilla who did dis iz prawbibly dead by now.

 

[randgrithr]

Heah for purpuziz uv completeniz iz da engine witch iz a strait six. Da stick is optshunal. Ha ha ha I kill me. But I digress. I dink dis izza late 1940s Chevy based mostly onna shape udda grill an headlites witch I dint take a pictchur uv. Az youse can imagine awl da identifaiyin mawks wuz removed eider by da wiseguys wut did dis evil deed aw by randum lootas.

 

[randgrithr]

I em pretty shure dat da car once looked like dis. Da grill an headlitez wuz just like da one heah. Dis izza 1946 Chevy. So just FYI da statchoota limitashunz haz run out awn dis crime unless dey can awlso prove dere wuz moida involved. I hope youse haz injoyed dis instructiv end edjucayshunal photo tootawrial awn wut happinz to dose who mess widda Cugini. Dank youse end havva nice day. De End.

 

[Inkspot]

Huh ? Say that again.

 

[randgrithr]

Youse godda prawblim widda wayaI tawk? Fuhgeddaboudit!

Just fordda recud, Brooklynese izza lot like Joymin. It iz offin pruhnouwnzed fonetticlee. []

 

[Wheelah23]

Bein' from New Joisey, I can undahstand you pretty well. I been to da city a few times, so I know da kinda peeple you's talkin' about...

 

[kwalker]

Still think South Jersey should become its own state...you guys seem a bit different than us down here...

....vs