pyshodoodle
Well-Known Member
I GOT THIS EMAIL TODAY & HAD TEARS POURING OUT OF MY EYES! HAD TO SHARE IT!!!
] KateIf you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma! This
is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day
at work think of this guy.
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio
station, (103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana), who was sponsoring a
"worst job experience" contest.
She won the contest with this:
Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down
lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make
you realize it's not so bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a
few technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to
the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool.
What we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial
water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the
sea, which heats it to a more delightful temperature. The water is then
pumped down to the diver through a garden hose, which is secured to the
air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it
several times with no complaints.
What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose
and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit
with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within
a few seconds my butt started to burn.
I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.
In agony I realized what had happened.
The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my
suit.
Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't
stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch; I was actually grinding the
jellyfish into the crack of my butt.
I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His
instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other
divers, were all laughing hysterically.
Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes
before I could reach the surface to begin my dry-chamber decompression.
When I arrived at the
surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my
butt as soon as I got in the chamber.
T he cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my
butt was swollen shut.
So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think
about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your
butt.
Repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job".
From now on whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself "is this a
jellyfish bad day"?
May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!
